Unfortunately parenting does not come with a manual, nor are our children's behaviours predictable, understandable or consistent. Due to external factors like school, peers, demands, and family difficulties, people behave in different ways. Parents parent differently from individual to individual, therefore conflict is inevitable.
Some potential reasons for these differences include culture, personality, family size, parental background, socioeconomic status, educational level and religion. Of course, the parenting styles of individual parents also combine to create a unique blend in each and every family.
Psychologist Diana Baumrind (1967) suggested that the majority of parents display one of three different parenting styles:
A fourth style, an uninvolved parenting style, is characterised by few demands, low responsiveness and little communication.
Conversely, children who share a home and are raised in the same environment can grow up to have astonishingly different personalities than one another. Therefore it is safe to assume that whilst consistency ensures boundaries and guidelines for children, one parenting style may not be appropriate for all children. Finding the most suitable parenting style for your children is half the battle. Consider a situation where the mother displays an authoritative style while the father favours a more permissive approach. In order to create a cohesive approach to parenting, it is essential that parents learn to cooperate as they combine various elements of their unique parenting styles.
Referring to the different styles of parenting, it is helpful to see the ramifications:
Parenting does not have to conform to one style, however teaching children consequences can start at one's self awareness of the consequences of their parenting, in their children's behaviour, performance, self esteem, motivation and manners.
Practical suggestions that assist in dealing with parenting issues are listed below: